Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Complete Rambling - Thoughts thrown on paper

Wow - so 10 years ago tomorrow is the exact date that I met my ex-husband, Kevin. Hard to believe it's been that long. Hard to truly contemplate how much can happen in 10 years. Hard to see how off-track things can get.

I remember that period of time like it was yesterday. I had just lost a really good friend in the Aggie Bonfire collapse, and was trying to deal with that loss. It seemed like the end of the world. The lowest of the lows.

One thing I've noticed in my life is what I've deemed the super swing trend. I might have the lowest of lows, but they've typically been followed by the highest of highs. That's definitely how I felt when I met Kevin - highest of high. He was young, handsome, funny, and just enough of a bad boy (ha) to make it interesting. I was hooked.

He taught me so much - about loving and laughing, but also about conflict, fighting, and disappointment. And finally about letting go. We definitely chose to learn our lessons the hard way, and in the end, there was too much between us for it to be repaired.

In the divorce/separation, I found something that I didn't know was still there: me. Different than before, yes. More scared in a lot of ways. More outspoken as well. Not necessarily the best combination.

This year has been a tough one, and I'll be glad to see it gone, although I wouldn't change a thing. It's been another year of loss and yet a year of friendships and knowledge gained. It's been another year of letting go, and yet a year to learn who and what's worth holding on to. It's been another year of lessons, all put there for a purpose or a reason, I'm sure. But in the end, another year of love as well. And that's never a bad thing...

1 Comments:

At 8:31 AM, Blogger Thomas J Wolfenden said...

Glad to see you're back and pulling through it.

My divorce was the worst period of my life, but also it was a new beginning, because if I'd not gone through it, I'd not be where I'm at today, doing the job that I love and what I've always wanted to do.

 

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