Tuesday, June 27, 2006

VBS or Bust

Today was day one of my tenure over the 2-3 year olds at our church's Vacation Bible School.
The kids are great. I can openly talk about it now that I've had my massage, bubble bath and two hour nap for the day. It's funny how five two-year-olds can make a full days work at my job look like a day in the park...

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Lord Help Me

It's family reunion time again.
Tomorrow, I'll make the 250-mile journey to Kerrville to be cheek-pinched until I bruise, to be constantly grilled on my choice to not yet mother a child, and to be forced to dress up in Western garb since our reunions always have cheesy themes.
I'm contemplating going for the fiesta theme this year in an outright act of rebellion.

Monday, June 19, 2006

The Latest Installment in the Bud Light Series:

Check it out - we have our own commercial now :)

Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius.
Real Men of Genuis

Today we salute you Mr. Way Too Proud of Texas Guy.

Mr. Way Too Proud of Texas Guy!

Men from lesser states might know their state's capital, but you? You know you're state's bird, tree and even reptile.

Love that horny toad.

You display your pride with your Lone Star tattoo, "Native Texan" bumper sticker, and contempt for any state that doesn't start with "Tex" and end with "as."

That spells Texas.

Sure, there are 49 other states in the Union, but they are smaller, wussier, and the people talk funny.

Yankee wussies.

So crack open a nice cold Bud Light, oh lover of the Lone Star state. Because all that flag waving must have made you thirsty.

Friday, June 16, 2006

A WOO HOO!

IT'S PAY DAY, BIOTCHES!!!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Country Girl?

Yesterday, one of the girls in the office told us she had a surprise breakfast that she was going to make for us.
I was so excited - in my mind, I envisioned kolaches, cheesecake, scrambled eggs, breakfast tacos, or something of the like.
She shows up with deviled eggs and caviar.
Eww.
Turns out I'm not big on fish eggs prior to 8:00 am.
OR EVER.

Sunday, June 11, 2006

A Day In The Life

Last week, when my girls were in town, I had made arrangements to pick Lisa up from her friend's apartment in Houston.
Being that I'm stupid when it comes to directions, Lisa and friend agreed to meet me at the front gate and drive me to the apartment.
So when I get to the apartment, I (obviously)call Lisa, and our telephone convo goes something like this:
Lisa: Hello?
Courtney: Shibbie! I'm here - where to go now?
Lisa: Take a left at the first intersection after the front gate and I'll meet you in the car. I'm in a blue Chevy Aveo.
Courtney: Oh, I think I see you...ooh, kickin' car, Shibbie. I'll bet you're having fun with that, huh? (she says in semi-sarcastic tone.)
Lisa: Don't make fun of it, it gets 40 miles to the gallon.
Courtney: (thinks to herself, "I wonder why Lisa's so defensive over somebody else's car," but stupidly continues) Well it should get 40 miles to the gallon, it looks like a freakin' egg with lights!
Lisa: gives her best "I'm not mad" half-hearted laugh

Upon nearing the car, Courtney is hit with the thought that something's off. Is it that Lisa appears to have darkened her hair? No no, that's not it. Perhaps the fact that Lisa's hair appears to have magically straightened itself? And then it hits her like a ton of bricks - it's the fact that it's not actually Lisa who's talking back to her! Shit, shit, shit! It's actually Lisa's friend, and owner of said car, who Courtney's been sarcastically conversing with.

As Courtney gets out of her own cheap ass, economical car, she gives her best "nothing's happened here" smile at Shibbie-friend and says, "It's so nice to meet you, I've heard so much about you."
Shit, shit, shit!

Friday, June 09, 2006

Always the Bridesmaid...

Baby showers at work are the worst.
We had one this morning. It's probably the 6th one that we've had since I've been working here.
Inevitably, creepy coworker is going to turn to me midway through the shower and say in a voice loud enough for EVERYBODY to hear, "I think we know who's next."
STOP IT!

Monday, June 05, 2006

Girls Weekend Is:

Laying out at the pool...


Going to the beach...


And having "spa" night


It's being silly...


And being sassy...


Being healthy...


And being bad...


But most of all, it's about being with your girls :)