Camping Pics

Today was picture development day. I finally got my pictures developed from our camping trip in August, so I thought I'd share. I have the picture of the random German diver that rescued my phone from the depths of Lake Livingston, and I wanted to post it, but I wasn't able to figure out how to rotate the picture so that he's not on his side. Any tips on that would be appreciated!!!

Kevin and Kimberly (and Alan's legs) sweating their asses off at our campsite

Me with my girls, Shana and Kimberly (along with Shana's puppy, Lilu)

Pictures From the Costume Party

Grandma Bob, who almost busted his head several times while trying to pop wheelies

Nurse Candace and Doctor Dane throwing a peace sign.

80-year-old Frankie and his oxygen tank, next to Cowboy Firefighter Jeff and Granny Bob.

Geeky Firefighter Kev, Ashlee Simpson Co and Hugh Hefner Eric.

Yeah, I totally caved and went to the party at Stacie's house. If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em...why sit at home when you can dress up as Ashlee Simpson and bust out some tunes on the karaoke, right?

Craigers and Fee-dawg

Happy Anniversary, Craig and Felicia!
You guys are the best brother and (future) sister-in-law a girl could ever have :)

Baseball Talk

I think I'm going to take my "I Heart Brad" shirt, draw a line through "Brad" and add the name "Brandon." Brandon Backe was on fire last night. Phil Garner should be beaten in the streets at dawn for pulling him in the 7th. That's all I'm gonna say about that.
And also - GO 'STROS! You're still my boys! And I would secretly date any one of you. Yep. I think we should get the hottest team award, at the very least. Except for Adam Everett - he reminds me of Raggedy Andy...a good fielding, shitty batting Raggedy Andy.

RIP Lolita

I just closed out my favorite credit card, Lolita.
It was difficult, I won't lie.
We've had some good times together, Lo and me, and that card has been with me throughout some of the biggest and most spontaneous purchases of my life. But it's over now, and there's no use in dragging it out.
A moment of silence for Lolita. She was a good card - she swiped smoothly and did not judge when I charged $.96 for a burrito at Taco Bell. But I've got to do what's right for me...

A word of wisdom for all of you people out there who have to call your credit card company to close out a card: show no fear. Those people can smell fear even through a telephone. They prey on weakness. It happened to me. But I was strong and shut my ears to their temptation of higher credit limits. NO - I WILL NOT BE SWAYED!

Roy and Morgan

I was tallying up my sleep since Friday.
It's not pretty: 18 hours in the last 5 days.
This is partially due to the Astros. In fact, I've named the bags under my eyes Roy Oswalt (for giving up 5 runs) and Morgan Ensberg (for not hitting in the winning run in the 9th). Needless to say, it was a pretty late night last night. In fact, it's the first time I've thought about calling Lisa in California and realized that it was too late there to call, though she's two hours behind us...
Need Coffee!

Stupid Wobot

I babysat for our friends' son today. Jay and Kim went out looking for houses all day, and Kevin got called out to work, leaving Owen and me to watch the Astros.
Long story short, I wanted to watch the Astros, but I also didn't want Owen to be bored, and he's clearly not interested in watching baseball, being that he's four...
DING! Lightbulb above head comes on! Kids love gadgets, and I have a broken cell phone sitting on the kitchen counter ( it's the one I tossed into the lake a few months ago), so I figured I'd give him the phone to play with. So he's playing, and dialing, and talking, and wiggling, and dancing. He's basically being a four year old. Perfect time to run to the bathroom, right? Wrong. As I'm sitting in the bathroom, I hear Owen going, "NO WOBOT. I ALWEADY TOLD YOU DA NAME!" Shit, who's he talking to??? I truck it back to the living room, only to find Owen, trying to figure out voice commands on my cell phone. He had traded in the broken phone, opened my actual, working phone instead, and when it said, "Who would you like to call?" He replied, "My Papaw." Of course, my phone doesn't recognize this command, so it asks the question again, "Who would you like to call." This angers Owen, who in return says, "I told you alweady, I want to call My Papaw!" This exchange takes place for several minutes, causing me to start laughing at the sight of it, causing Owen to turn to me and say, "Iss not funny, Cowtney, this wobot wont stop messin' wif me." He then continues (to 'the robot'), "You not very good at ya job, wobot."
I was cracking up. He's hilarious...

And also, I take back every bad thing I ever said about beer at a baby shower. It was possibly the best time I've ever had at a shower, EVER. And that includes my own wedding shower, which I now know could have been much improved with the addition of a keg...but then again, hindsight's 20/20.
Sure we had to play some silly clothes pin game today, which I lost, but I had beer and barbecue to console me. No better consolation than that! So suck it up pregnant women, and embrace the alcoholic shower. Do it for your friends and family's sake!

T-Shirt Mania

Tonight's going to be T-Shirt Friday!
How very exciting. I've opted to make my own Astros tee, being that nobody around here has Astros gear. Plus, I want my shirt to be original.
I'm thinking the front will say "I Heart Brad."
I'm debating on either "..But I'm sleeping with Roy," or "Kick the Shit out of the Socks" for the back.
Then again, I might be lame and just go with "Mrs. Lidge" for the back. It's still not as bad as "BZZZZZZZ." What is up with that?

Again with the Hunker Down

OK - so I just found this clip on yahoo news. Please note the use of the term "hunkered down." It's everywhere, I tell you!

CANCUN, Mexico - The fearsome core of Hurricane Wilma slammed into the island of Cozumel early Friday, starting a long, grinding march across Mexico's resort-studded coastline, where thousands of stranded tourists hunkered down in shelters and hotel ballrooms.

Aww HUNKA DOWN now!!!
It's on the rise. Better get on board now with the new lingo...

GOOOOOO 'STROOOOOO'S!!!

WE'RE GOIN' TO THE WORLD SERIES!!!

I Smell T-R-O-U-B-L-E

Going running in my neighborhood is always an experience.
First of all, the hood rat boys in the neighborhood can always be counted on to shout out rude things such as, "Nice ASS" and "Gimme a piece of THAT" all the while mixing in whistles and "whoohoo" shouts as you run by. The kids are old enough to know better, so I've taken to flipping off the little bastards as I pass them. I don't even wait for the shouting to commence anymore. I just spot them and get middle finger into ready mode. Jackasses!
If they don't get to you, the little kids that follow you on their bicycles, riding dangerously close to your ankles and screaming, "beep beep" are sure to distract you. One kid actually clipped my ankles with his little trike one time. Jackasses in training, I tell you!
And if, by chance, you make it through the big and little kids, the animals are there as a last line of defense to ensure that unhealthy Americans stay that way. Just yesterday, I had gone jogging and ran across this beautiful little dog that ran up to me out of nowhere. It followed me for probably 1/3 of a mile, jumping on my legs and tripping me up. When, finally, I stopped to pet it, it starts crazy growling at me and bearing it's teeth. That's no good. Jackass animals too?
It's a conspiracy to force me indoors - I know it!
I can't do that. I've got the bad metabolism and my thighs are susceptible to dimpling!
Nobody wants that...

DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN

DAMN PUJOLS!
How in the hell did we have two outs, nobody on, and two strikes on the batter in the 9th inning, and end up giving up a 3-run walk off homerun?
DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN!

In Need of Creativity

Shite. It's already Halloween again, and still I have no costume.
I want to be something different this year. I've been GI Jane. I've been a hippie.
It's time for something outrageous.
I could dress up as Ashlee Simpson, carry a radio and blare her cd, and lip sync the wrong words. That could be funny.
I had thought of going as this guy at work, Darrell, who always insists that everything is fraud. But that would only be funny to the people at work. Damn, he has a wrap around too - I could totally gel my hair in a swirl atop my head. That would definitely be funny!
Any ideas?

How Aggie Jokes Came To Be

I went to Texas A&M University, home of the Fightin' Texas Aggies, birthplace of the Fightin' Texas Aggie Jokes. There are many different people/places/events that inspire these jokes, and I was fortunate enough to be a part of one such event.
One day, I was hungry for a Schlotzsky's sandwich, so I hopped in my car and headed over to Schlotzsky's. To my dismay, the line was horribly long, but I was hungry and willing to wait.
One by one, the cars pull up to order, sit for about 4 minutes (which is a ridiculous amount of time to sit and wait to order), then pull up to the pick-up window. I'm about the 6th car in line, so by the time I get to the screen where you order, I'm a bit upset.
So I sit there a few minutes, waiting for those 5 precious words, "Can I take your order?" I sit, and wait, and wait, much like the 5 cars before me. I start to get pissed. How long must one wait to give their order?
Just when I'm about to beat my head on the steering wheel, I notice the sign that says, "Closed for Remodeling."
DAMN!
And as I start to drive off in despair, I notice the car behind me pull up to the drive thru order screen and stop. There are about 4 cars behind him, waiting. And for a brief moment, I considered getting out of the car and telling them about the sign before they too waited unnecessarily. And then I thought better of it. This, after all, is what Aggie jokes are made of. And you can't deprive people of that...

GIMME MY CLOTHES BACK!!!

To the dry cleaning bitch that has taken my clothes captive:
Screw you. Screw you for telling me that my clothes would be ready at 6:00 on Tuesday. Screw you for telling me to come back at 6:15, when they weren't ready at 6:00 as promised, and then being rude to me when I came back at 6:40 for my clothes. Screw you for the non-apologies at 6:40, when my clothes still weren't ready on Tuesday and then when they STILL weren't ready yesterday at 5:45. Screw you for telling me to COME BACK at 7:00 last night, which I did not, as I'm tired of wasting precious gas in my quest for crisp clothing.
As soon as I get my clothes back, I'm over you, dry cleaning nazi!
May you live a life of wrinkled and musty smelling clothing.

All About the Eyebrows

I'm obsessed with eyebrows.
That's right, eyebrows. I'm a freak, I know...
I actually dated this guy in high school, who would lay his head in my lap while we watched TV. Upside down, his eyebrows and entire face took on the image of an old lady. It totally creeped me out and actually contributed to the downfall of our relationship...nobody wants to date an old lady! It's now been 8 years since I've seen or talked to this guy, but still I can picture his granny face, looking up at me. CREEPY!!!
Recently, my friend Lisa pointed out that Charlotte from "Sex and the City," has very expressive eyebrows. They droop dramatically when she's sad, they perk up excitedly when she's happy. Sometimes they look like they operate independently of her body. It's creating issues for me now, because it's all I can look at. I actually...gasp...turned off SATC the other night because I couldn't deal with it anymore.
I have to figure out some way to ignore her brows so that I can keep my relationships in tact with Carrie, Samantha and Miranda. Please, advice anybody???

The Aussie

I talk to Keith Urban on a weekly basis...
The new operator at the plant where Kevin works is deliciously Australian, complete with delicious Australian accent.
He calls our house each week to talk to Kevin.
And I love him.
And though Kevin insists that the guy is short and stocky with black hair, in my mind he's totally Keith Urban. Yummy.

Disco Inferno

I just saw (in the yellow pages) a gym called, "Burn Baby Burn Aerobics."
Killer.

Too Boring to Come Up With Something Interesting

Have you ever had days where you feel giddy, and you're not sure why?
Yesterday was one of those days for me...
And I don't know why. Work was horrible. My desk is a wreck and I'm not sure when I'm going to have time to catch up. But for some reason, I felt extremely happy last night. We didn't do much: went to my parents' house and hung out with the fam before returning home and spending a night in front of the TV. But I was giggly, and I spent the night singing songs that were clearly out of my vocal range. Most songs are out of my vocal range, come to think of it.
I did make blackened talapia for dinner...maybe they put some kind of drug in fish these days. I'll bet it's the bacteria from the ocean at work within me. Turns out it's euphoric...
Perhaps I'll have talapia again tonight.

Beer at a Baby Shower?

Kevin and I just got an invitation to a co-ed baby shower. Sounds cool, right? I like the idea of the men taking part in the baby shower. They sure as hell took part in making the baby. So as I'm reading the invitation, I notice a section that says, "cold beer will be served for the men."
Are you effing kidding me?
This poor girl has now been without even one alcoholic beverage for 8 months, and they're going to serve alcohol at her baby shower? And only to the men? That' just not right!

Sushi, Sex and Saturdays

Today was the perfect day: I slept until 10:40, shopped a bit, ate California rolls with my dad, and watched Sex and the City all by my lonesome tonight. Perfect. One could not ask for more out of life...
I almost came home with a dog today. Almost. The Galveston County Animal Shelter had a booth set up at the mall, complete with dogs in bandanas who were pawing at the passing people in an attempt to get adopted. Here's where I feel there's danger in that: the mall is filled with spontaneous shoppers. Fine if you're buying a shirt. OK if you're purchasing jewelry. Not alright if you're going home with a living, breathing creature. A 10 to 15-year commitment should not be made at the drop of a hat in some mall. I had to talk myself through it, remembering that I was almost overtaken by two cats in my car during the evacuation. One more on their side, and I'm sure I would have been overthrown. So I remained strong, turned from the cutest dog ever, and headed instead, to the sushi place.
I also ran into one of my friends from high school, who of course, brought news of more high school friends who are with child. What is it about being 25 that makes people be like, "MUST...BEAR...CHILD!" I mean, I am happy for them, and it must be amazing to be in a place where you feel ready for children. I just don't understand it yet...
But then again, I'm still not even ready for the responsibility of parenting a puppy! How sad is that?